2017 - The Year of Life

While many people are referring to 2016 as the year of the dumpster fire, with so many deaths, a nasty presidential election, and country literally torn in two from police support to education - who wouldn't want the year to end.  But I have a different viewpoint.  It was the first year of my son's life and a great one at that.  He has learned to walk, talk, eat on his own and develop in so many magical ways that this year could never be replaced for me.  My baby is growing up.

However, here is an example of why 2016 has a bad wrap.  Dear family friends recently lost their son to a tragic accident.  At the young age of 23, Evan will never again grace us with his smile.  Even though I have not seen this young man in a number of years, watching him grow up through photos and Facebook made me think about what a wonderful young man he had become and what an amazing future he had in store for him.  Too soon, a life taken too soon from his family and friends.

Tonight, as I rock my baby to sleep, I think what if, what if in 22 years or sooner a tragic accident happens to my son. Words could not describe the emotions that ran through me as a mom and the fear for his future. Then realization hit quickly after and I took a deep breath.  Fear should not be what I am feeling, but rather hope, joy and love for what the next however many years has in store.  His future is his own and it will be an adventure to watch it unfold.  So with the end of all the tragedy that makes up 2016, I plan to remember the greatness and move into 2017 with a new focus.

I have always struggled balancing life and work - a guilty confession from a working mom.  Now that my husband is starting a new job, which will create less family time, I now have to get a grip with what my balance should be.  My family will be my number one focus for 2017.  While I have set some personal goals for work, running, and writing, nothing will take precedence over my son and husband.  

One of the saddest and greatest things about Facebook, is seeing how people can be remembered.  I did not know Evan well as he got older, but everyone has indicated his laugh and outlook on life were unforgettable. Stink, if there is one lasting impression you have made, know that your life was important to those around you and you have made this mom reevaluate her outlook and priorities.  Thank you for the memories I have of you and you will be missed.